Monday, January 02, 2006
Rating The Sex Parties (Pt.1)
Hopefully these postings have given readers an idea of what types of sex parties are out there. Out there being the San Francisco Bay area. Several people suggested I stick my neck out a little more, and name names as to what parties are worth going to, what ones are not.
This sounded like a good idea, and as we are at the end of the year when "top ten" lists get compiled, I thought I would join the fray. So here's a handful of the year's "best" sex parties, and the ho-hummers. This will be one of the rare times when I identify the parties by their actual names. How else would you know where to go?
Let me refresh for you though what qualities go into making a good sex party. My partner and I, being the queer little faggots we can be, tend to like a mixed crowd, hetero, queer, bi, transgendered. We like seeing everything, and the stranger the better. We like action that is fairly unstructured, but still organized enough that weird things don't happen; people can feel secure in where they are. We like enough warmth in the place, enough space and decent music to carry through the evening.
Barry and Shells are about the oldest group in existence, out of Oakland. For my money, this is probably the "straightest" crowd imaginable, and because of this I would probably not go back.
This is wife-swapping, basically, and although a party has to start somewhere, this one is too relentlessly heterosexual. And rather conventional. I did mention in my posting about it that I looked around the play room and noticed I was the only woman on top of her partner. The space is rather crowded, the food and music so-so. They don't enforce a "no-clothes" rule, or even erotic attire. So this one gets the bottom of my list. But for newcomers, it may be a perfect stop.
At the top of my list, my partner D and I really like the Black Sheets parties, in San Francisco's Mission District. The attitude is very free and easy here, helped along by the funky four-story old house where the parties are held. Lots of hetero people, but lots of fine queers as well. If you don't like seeing men in dresses, you probably shouldn't be here. People seem able to readily hook up here. The atmosphere is tops, the downstairs playrooms are quite suitable for fun, the lighting is soft enough that you feel comfortable and you can also see; the music is absolutely the best, lots of electronica, world beat, dance, techno.
I am firm in the opinion that what makes a great sex party is all about the crowd. We like some parties over others because we fit in with some of the crowds, but not with others. That's the difference.
I wish I could find a few more thin women at the Black Sheets. I am told they do show up from time to time. But the eye candy at this party is amazing nonetheless. There is queerness every where you turn. My partner and I really like that.
A note: Unfortunately, as of a few weeks ago, the Black Sheets are no more. The owners apparently rather abruptly decided, for whatever reasons, that they needed a break from their party activities. We have yet to see what will take their place. If anything. RIP Black Sheets. A San Francisco institution.
This sounded like a good idea, and as we are at the end of the year when "top ten" lists get compiled, I thought I would join the fray. So here's a handful of the year's "best" sex parties, and the ho-hummers. This will be one of the rare times when I identify the parties by their actual names. How else would you know where to go?
Let me refresh for you though what qualities go into making a good sex party. My partner and I, being the queer little faggots we can be, tend to like a mixed crowd, hetero, queer, bi, transgendered. We like seeing everything, and the stranger the better. We like action that is fairly unstructured, but still organized enough that weird things don't happen; people can feel secure in where they are. We like enough warmth in the place, enough space and decent music to carry through the evening.
Barry and Shells are about the oldest group in existence, out of Oakland. For my money, this is probably the "straightest" crowd imaginable, and because of this I would probably not go back.
This is wife-swapping, basically, and although a party has to start somewhere, this one is too relentlessly heterosexual. And rather conventional. I did mention in my posting about it that I looked around the play room and noticed I was the only woman on top of her partner. The space is rather crowded, the food and music so-so. They don't enforce a "no-clothes" rule, or even erotic attire. So this one gets the bottom of my list. But for newcomers, it may be a perfect stop.
At the top of my list, my partner D and I really like the Black Sheets parties, in San Francisco's Mission District. The attitude is very free and easy here, helped along by the funky four-story old house where the parties are held. Lots of hetero people, but lots of fine queers as well. If you don't like seeing men in dresses, you probably shouldn't be here. People seem able to readily hook up here. The atmosphere is tops, the downstairs playrooms are quite suitable for fun, the lighting is soft enough that you feel comfortable and you can also see; the music is absolutely the best, lots of electronica, world beat, dance, techno.
I am firm in the opinion that what makes a great sex party is all about the crowd. We like some parties over others because we fit in with some of the crowds, but not with others. That's the difference.
I wish I could find a few more thin women at the Black Sheets. I am told they do show up from time to time. But the eye candy at this party is amazing nonetheless. There is queerness every where you turn. My partner and I really like that.
A note: Unfortunately, as of a few weeks ago, the Black Sheets are no more. The owners apparently rather abruptly decided, for whatever reasons, that they needed a break from their party activities. We have yet to see what will take their place. If anything. RIP Black Sheets. A San Francisco institution.
TO BE CONTINUED
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